Editorial

Never Change, Philly: Phillies End $1 Hot Dog Nights Because Fans Simply Cannot Act Civilized

Screenshot/Twitter/@mleif

Robert McGreevy Contributor
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The Philadelphia Phillies are ending their vaunted dollar hot dog night because their primitive slob fanbase wouldn’t stop throwing the dogs at each other.

Those jerks in Philly just can’t help themselves.

The team announced they will be replacing the promotion with a limited run of buy one, get one free hot dogs. “This modification to the previous Hatfield Phillies Franks Dollar Dog Nights is based on the organization’s ongoing commitment to provide a positive experience for all fans in attendance,” they said in a press release.

The positive experience they hope to provide is one in which fans aren’t pelted by scores of dollar dogs like they were in April.

 

Imagine taking your kid to the ballpark, when suddenly a torrential downpour of processed meat rains down on him from above. (RELATED: Shohei Ohtani Hits Oppo Taco Bomb In Dodgers Debut)

This story is so Philadelphia, it might as well be holding a cheesesteak and a BluRay copy of Rocky II. The notoriously uncouth fanbase is so out of line, they can’t even be trusted with cheap hot dogs.

“It wasn’t just the throwing,” the team’s senior vice president John Weber said, according to The Associated Press (AP). “It’s the concourse, the crowds of everybody being at the same X amount of stands. But obviously, you know, the throwing was a little bit of a tipping point.”


The wiener war prompted the team to hold their fans accountable and say enough is enough. Great job, Philly. You ruined it for everyone who just enjoyed a cheap hot dog at the ballpark. But I suppose it’s to be expected from the fanbase so notoriously nasty that they booed Santa Claus.