I have to admit, the following is the only good reason I could give you to vote for the worst presidential candidate of my lifetime. But I just can't do it. Not even to get rid of Lena Dunham.
Jim Treacher | All Articles
ATTN Game of Thrones fans: Your assistance is needed. But first, you must put aside your own well-being.
Anthony Weiner resigned from Congress in disgrace after he sent pictures of his penis to women who weren't his wife and then tried to blame his critics for it. A couple of years later, in a bid to rehabilitate his political career, Weiner decided to run for mayor of New York City. The plan was that, win or lose, he would prove his mettle as a serious-minded man of the people. He would make everyone forget his past transgressions. He would take the "wiener" out of "Weiner."
OUT: "You can't fight in here. This is the War Room!"
IN: "You can't sing 'The Star-Spangled Banner' here. This is the 9/11 Memorial!"
Michael Stipe used to be the lead singer for a popular rock band called R.E.M. That was a long time ago.
Sometimes, people who just happen to be teenagers do bad things. But they don't do those bad things because they're teenagers. Plenty of other teenagers don't do bad things! Plus, adults do bad things too.
I would've been in my early teens the first time I ever saw Prince on MTV. It might've been "1999," or maybe "Controversy" before that, I'm not sure. I just remember being weirded out by the freaky dude in mascara, but really liking the guitars.
Yesterday, journalist and world-class troll* Milo Yiannopoulos spoke at DC's American University. And, as tends to be the case when conservative speakers dare to set foot on a college campus in 2016, he was met by angry protesters.
You're currently reading this, which means you have Internet access, which means I don't have to tell you that today is Earth Day. You've been bombarded with it already.
Most political ads that attempt humor fall flat. And while there are a lot of things I like about Ted Cruz , a funny guy he is not. So it's surprising that his campaign ads are actually pretty amusing. Well, compared to most campaign ads, at least.
It used to be that the Secret Service was the one federal agency everybody admired. Those guys willingly put their lives on the line to protect the second-most powerful man in the free world. How awesome is that?
Hey, you know mine: "resplendent." But how about you?
I've learned two very important lessons from American rock legend Bruce Springsteen: 1) "Young" and "run" are apparently acceptable rhymes, and 2) A human being should be able to use any bathroom xe wants to use. You see, Bruce knows that gender is a social construct. As is race. And if you disagree, I don't need to listen to you because you're probably a white man.
It's tough to keep up with the 24/7 news cycle, man. By the time I can think of an alliterative headline for the latest social-justice hoax, it's already old news!
I know that sounds harsh, but Joe said it, I didn't.
In an unexpected turn that will shock anyone who was literally born yesterday, Donald Trump just won the NY Republican primary. But in that yuuuuuge punch bowl of delicious victory, some mischievous scamp has plopped in a teensy-tiny turd.
Or maybe you will, if you've been paying attention.
The name Bruce Jenner has really taken a beating in recent years. At first it meant: "Eat your Wheaties and be like this guy." Then it meant: "Watch this pathetic milquetoast get humiliated by the Kardashians every week." And now it means: "Stop deadnaming this beautiful woman who has always been a woman and always will be a woman, you transphobic bigot!" It's a damn shame what's happened to the Bruce Jenner brand.
I've been trying to think of a person named Corey I've ever liked. How about this guy?
Liberals love science, unless they think it might hurt someone's feelings.