Ask Matt Labash

Ask Matt Labash: Pass the gluten and eating puppies

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Puppy

Eating a bass is like eating a puppy

What does the 'BT' in 'LGBT' REALLY stand for?

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Gay Pride Parade in Buenos Aires

I have more affinity with the ‘L’s’ in LGBT — we are both, after all, staunch proponents of having sex with women

Ask Matt Labash: Redskins name-blaming and the joy of taking offense

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Redskins

Sexually-frustrated Satanists aren’t demanding the Duke Blue Devils change their moniker

Ask Matt Labash: Miley Cyrus, the sluttification of America, and the mystery of real women

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2013 MTV Video Music Awards

Real women use their tongues to say things worth listening to — not just to lick things

Whose advice can you believe?

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advicecolumnists
Matt Labash explains why you should not seek advice from advice columnists

Ask Matt Labash: Deadly Diet Coke, artificially-sweet lies, and blinding me with 'science'

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Diet Coke
It seems our expiration is the only certainty that all science can agree upon

Ask Matt Labash: Fly Fishing apolitically, the worst governor in America (Martin O'Malley), and wingnut environmentalism

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Governors Meeting

‘Despite O’Malley’s purported charms, he has never met a pocket he wouldn’t pick’

Ask Matt Labash: Jeans -- a buyer's guide for middle-aged straight men

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Denim Jeans

‘Personally, I think of buying new jeans the way most people think of retirement savings’

Ask Matt Labash: Rethinking the Religion of Peace, and photographic evidence

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Muslims praying

On the bloodlust of Judeo-Christian troglodytes and the notable paucity of Labash imagery

Ask Matt Labash: iPads, iDistractions and plugging your ears to silence the silence

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Apple CEO.JPEG

I think we’re being too hard on tablets. They are just another symptom of the underlying disease

Ask Matt Labash: Do's and dont's of wedding songs, why Adele sucks, and the evils of remix dances

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Oscars Adele.JPEG

‘I’m taking this opportunity to bash the most overpraised singer of this generation’

Ask Matt Labash: Killing fish vs. seeing hookers, The Lamest Generation (Boomers), and the virtue of mystery

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prostitutes

Is employing the services of a prostitute a mortal sin on a par with keeping fish?

Ask Matt Labash: How to handle your gay friend’s smelly boyfriend, and why we’re getting dumber

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alg-al-roker-today-jpg

It’s your job to like your friend, not your friend’s smelly lover

Ask Matt Labash: Poison Apple, the death of books, and how to live responsibly by being irresponsible

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Fly_Fishing_by_FantasyStock

The fish you will catch in southwest Virginia exist outside of time

Ask Matt Labash: Why Facebook still sucks, spying hard, and selling buggy whips to blacksmiths

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Paula Broadwell on "The Daily Show."

We need more men who are not intimidated by long odds

Ask Matt Labash: Fly fishing through Armageddon, a post-election edition

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Bruce Springsteen - Obama

If Chris Christie is against gay marriage, why does he keep hitting on Bruce Springsteen?

Ask Matt Labash: Hurricane Sandy lifestyle adjustments

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Superstorm Sandy.JPEG

For most of us, it’s really hard not to watch calamity unfold

Ask Matt Labash: The joys of self-entitlement programs, undecided voters -- an un-appreciation, and Lizard Kings

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undecided_voters_of_america506d9f3aee897

Easy, dear reader. I’ve been out and about

Ask Matt Labash: Dare not to dream -- an anti-political rant - TheDC Opinion

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Vote Or Die Campaign Rally At Wayne State University

‘I’m generally predisposed toward Republicans. Not because I like them, particularly.’

Ask Matt Labash: Dougie-ing better than Michelle Obama - TheDC

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Michelle Obama
America's second or third most popular faux-advice column answers TheDC interns' most burning questions